Grieving the loss of a celebrity is a really strange thing. I have never met Robin Williams and in all likelihood know very little about him. That makes the experience of loss, at least for me, feel really confusing. When I found out about his death, I collapsed in a chair. I dropped the phone that had given me the news. The person I was with was shocked by the news too, but didn't understand why I was crying. I know that I can be a more emotional being than others around me at times -- my family members and I are notorious for this. But having my reaction to a death questioned is really suffocating. I am absolutely crushed by Robin Williams' death, and I don't want to have to defend that.
It's also a grieving experience without any sacredness or quiet or peace. I'm sharing this moment with hundreds of thousands of other people. It feels like a cliche to even write a post about it. I guess this is my own catharsis, and I'll leave it at that.
My favorite Robin Williams movie is Hook, and it was the first movie I ever saw him in. His filmography is obviously expansive, but to me he'll always be Peter Pan. Bangarang.