A few weeks ago I had one of the best weekends of my entire life. The IAD Barn Bash was on Saturday night, and on Friday night some of us gathered to choreograph a flash mob to surprise the two first year girls who worked so hard to organize the event. What we all thought would be a quick run-through turned into one of the most gleefully fun and rowdy nights I can ever remember having. Choreographing the flash mob turned into complexly orchestrated singalongs and beet-boxed freestyling tournaments and a dance party that meshed with the music from several bands playing at the house next door. We danced on the porch directly behind the stage and somehow we all got drenched in beer. Leap frog that turned into a dogpile and PBR everywhere and our clever but silly IAD banter that I love so much. When the party next door got busted by the cops (underage drinking, tsk tsk) they moved their headliner ska band to the basement and invited us over. The basement was the most crowded, sweatiest, steamiest thing imaginable and the band was just tuba and drums and tamborines and we danced for so long. I felt such overwhelming joy and love for my friends. As my friend Sara said, I’ve never felt so much love for so many people all at once. At 2am we went to El Burrito along with most other people in Davis. When I biked home at 3am, I was overflowing with happiness.

The next night was IAD Barn Bash, our annual fundraiser. It was held on a beautiful farm and we had a bluegrass band, fire pit and a (locally raised, grass-fed) pig roast, orchestrated by a couple of really enthusiastic guys who made a big production of it. Nearly 150 people showed up, many of whom were shuttled in on vans that Seth and Sara drove, blasting hip hop. There was dancing and the wine and beer were flowing and I was so proud of my friends for how hard we all worked to make the night a success. Not to mention we made bank. Once everyone had left we were all quite drunk but still responsible for cleaning everything up before we left. After a mini IAD dance party, as we do, we stumbled around trying to clean everything up and it could not have been sillier. I could not be more (lucky? blessed? these words bother me) to have ended up here in this wonderful place with these incredible people who share with me all the things I deem most important – love, laughter, passion. I love you so much IAD.

Some of these are mine, others are from my cohorties.

———————– The Best Night Ever

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sellers is always looking fly

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various stages of r’s facial hair removal + the engagement photo for a couple of wholesome homesteaders

———————– IAD Barn Bash

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n looks great with a knife

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prep

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barn decor

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happily manning the check-in table

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everyday we discover another one of j’s talents

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i fucking love this – i don’t even think he intended to look like a train conductor

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j did a phenomenally sassy job of leading the cake walk

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kebobs galore

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cooked by n with love

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goulash

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lots of people having fun!

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panmixia

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beautiful twilight

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next morning at hangover breakfast

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not too shabby for up till 4am!




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life was one long car ride through
the mountains -
defects, scars, look at the stars,
except when making sharp turns.
-for you to be happy
-for all the is important to you
-that you are smart
-that you are handsome
and to talk for hours,
(endless ways of saying this)
stop somewhere in the trees,
(endless ways of saying this)
herring and crackers and cheese.
in the purest way,
like an opaque white pebble lying
on a shiny white floor.
to make you laugh, to make you smile
with wine on our lips
that you were born
perfect to me.




here, beneath my lungs
i feel your thumbs
press into my skin again




I’ve been on a 1950s kick lately. I think it’s a combination of my first trip to In-N-Out, Mad Men (although I know that’s the 60s), the design blogging community’s obsession with the 50s aesthetic right now, and my stylish housemates who might as well have just stepped off the 50s time machine. Today (in all likelihood due to a hangover I have been experiencing since the thrice DJ’d party we threw last night) I have been drooling over etsy’s arsenal of vintage treasures for far too long. For instance, I just spent an hour alone on vintage sunglasses.

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And then! Telephones.

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Also cameras. I almost can’t even do this because I want all vintage cameras so much it hurts.

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And luggage.

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 And many other things.

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Oh, stuff. I love you so.




a few of my latest instagrams

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tour d’davis

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on development for sovereignty and autonomy

To me this course has been an introduction to a novel form of development that is by nature founded on a different way of thinking about the world. The readings have, in different ways, explored these modalities by telling a story that isn’t often told. It’s clear to me that for development to take the form envisioned by the authors, more people will need to hear and understand this story. This week’s reading discusses the true meaning of indigenous rights from the point of view of indigenous peoples themselves, and these ideas inform how development for indigenous rights ought to proceed. What makes me nervous is that, although there are plenty of people who advocate for indigenous rights, and more generally for the rights of the oppressed and marginalized, the majority of people continue to think about development within a capitalist framework. It is so crucial that people learn the origins and implications of the market economy and recognize the epistemologies that were borne and propagated by it, but at this point I feel that these ideas are still considered radical.

Regardless, I don’t see the fabric of society unraveling because of these ideas. The best we can hope for is the mobilization of a large and powerful enough base of development practitioners of this mindset that will carry out this novel form of development where possible. If the mindset spreads and monopolizes development practice, that would be a bonus. But until then, how does development founded on ideas of sovereignty and autonomy fit into a world almost entirely operating within the structures and epistemologies of neoliberalism? Are pockets and “islands,” if you will, of autonomous communities possible in this day in age? Can cultures operate autonomously within cultures?

I think this demands something that is simple but easier said than done — acceptance. People don’t have to understand one another to accept one another. It sounds like a cliche, but I really feel that this is the only way to get around the fact that epistemologies borne of capitalism are likely permanent and irreversible for most of the Western world. The mentality that the foreign should be changed into something more recognizable must become obsolete. The life projects of indigenous peoples may seem outrageous to members of the developed world, but that’s as it may be – live and let live is the essence of autonomy. I’m not saying progressive development practitioners should take to the streets preaching acceptance, I just think that this mentality is absolutely key for the success of a development for sovereignty and autonomy. Maybe tolerant co-existence isn’t ideal, but it may be the only option.




My most favorite part of spring break was this quiet day I spent drinking wine and listening to music and making art on the porch. I got gesso all over my hands and arms and it reminded me of that day in high school when the greenhouse gang put up the wall. We built the wall to separate the tropical ecosystem where we were going to keep turtles from the temperate ecosystem where we were going to raise butterflies. We painted the wall white, and then we painted our arms and hands and faces and shirts. And then we went to Wild Ginger for dinner with paint all over ourselves. That was the best day.

I love having paint on myself. And I love drinking wine and creating. In solitude, so I can leave everything else behind. All the sounds and smells become magnified. That’s when I’m the closest to myself, and the closest to being happy. Or at least, a happiness that is organic, that isn’t trailed by struggle.

It’s a kind of purity. It’s not bright, loud, or colorful. It’s just white, black and red.

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IAD tshirt(stay tuned for a T-SHIRT made from the above design)




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The reading I’ve been doing lately for my Development for Sovereignty and Autonomy class has turned my whole world completely upside down in the most wonderfully liberating way. This has been the most important and rewarding coursework of my grad school career, and maybe even of my entire life. Hungrily eating up the many intricacies of this discourse has made me excited to be a scholar like nothing else ever has. When I’m not farming this summer I plan to familiarize myself with as much of the related literature as I can. I hope that, by summer’s end, my scholarship will be richer than ever.

The Great Transformation, Karl Polanyi

The Industrial Revolution has been defined in lots of ways, but what truly accounts for its damage is the establishment of a market economy: “Previous to our time no economy has ever existed that, even in principle, was controlled by markets.”

“As long as markets and money were merely accessories to an otherwise self-sufficient household, the principles of production for use [not trade, etc.] could operate.”

“Mercantilism, with all its tendency towards commercialization, never attacked the safeguards which protected these two basic elements of production – labor and land – from becoming the objects of commerce…But labor and land are no other than the human beings themselves of which every society consists and the natural surroundings in which it exists. To include them in the market mechanism means to subordinate the substance of society itself into the laws of the market…As the organization of labor is only another word for the forms of life of the common people, this means that the development of the market system would be accompanied by a change in the organization of society itself. All along the line, human society had become an accessory of the economic system.”

“Unbounded hope and limitless despair looking toward regions of human possibilities yet unexplored were the mind’s ambivalent response to these awful limitations. Hope – the vision of perfectibility - was distilled out of the nightmare of population and wage laws, and was embodied in a concept of progress so inspiring that it appeared to justify the vast and painful dislocations to come…Poverty was nature surviving in society; that the limitedness of food and unlimitedness of man had come to an issue just when the promise of a boundless increase of wealth burst in upon us made the irony only the more bitter…Harmony was inherent in economy, it was said, the interests of the individual and the community being ultimately identical – but such harmonious self-regulation required that the individual should respect economic law even if it happened to destroy him.”

The Development Dictionary, Wolfgang Sachs

“Establishing economic value requires the disvaluing of all other forms of social existence. Disvalue transmogrifies skills into lacks, commons into resources, men and women into commodified labour, tradition into burden, wisdom into ignorance, autonomy into dependency. It transmogrifies people’s autonomous activities embodying wants, skills, hopes and interactions with one another, and with the environment, into needs whose satisfaction requires the mediation of the market.”

“By equating education with diplomas, following the economic definitions of learning, they lacked teachers and schools…After equating health with dependence on medical services, they lacked doctors, health centres, hospitals, drugs…After equating eating with the technical activities of production and consumption, linked to the mediation of the market by the state, they lacked income and suffered scarcity of food…Rather than being the iron law of every human society, scarcity is an historical accident.”

Probably all intro anthropology courses include a discussion of the misguided notions of early anthropologists who believed that primitive cultures were less evolved versions of affluent (Western) cultures and that inevitably they would follow the same trajectory towards civilization. The anthropology of today teaches that human cultures do not follow trajectories and that “civilization” is not superior, nor “traditional” cultures inferior.

So I’m no stranger to the idea that it is unacceptable for members of one culture to attempt to bestow their ways of life on another. And where anthropology and development meet, the implication is that development ought to be carried out with cultural sensitivity. That is, that any efforts to improve quality of life must be contextual, adaptable, and non-disruptive. In particular, development workers should be wary not to impose Western beliefs and ideals on peoples of other cultures.

I’ve heard all of that before. But these readings took that idea and told a story about it that I had never really heard before. I had sort of a transcendent moment while reading – I was sitting in a cafe learning the origin story (myth) of development and suddenly I stopped and looked around at the people sitting near me. To my left was a group of students discussing Lincoln republicans and the Wigs Party and Jeffersonians. And I just couldn’t believe that anyone could spend any time talking about that when the reality of everything is mostly just a lie.

I know that sounds dramatic, but I really feel that after having read this volume there will be a great deal of discussion that I can no longer take seriously. Not only that, but how can I even have a conversation with anyone who hasn’t read this? Because my degree has the word development in the title, I feel that this theory is absolutely crucial for myself and my cohort to study and understand before entering the world of development. It’s frightening for me to think how many folks with wonderful intentions propagate this mistelling of history through development practice.

I can say that the alternatives to development that the authors discuss – green economies, earth democracies and the Andean Cosmovision – do not go undiscussed in the IAD curriculum. These are things that we are thinking about, talking about and working on and although I’m deeply pessimistic, I do feel so much hope that at least we’re headed in the right direction.




three blogposts you definitely should read:

1. My fellow IADer on why big ideas matter

2. Ali’s Table of Contents

3. Jenny & Andy’s 100 Rules of Dinner